Separation Archives - Triangle Divorce Lawyers

Category Archives for "Separation"

Five Tips to Improve Co-Parenting During Your Separation and Divorce

by Michael Garner, One-eighty Counseling

Life did not turn out the way you had expected it. You are heart-broken, angry, and for some, maybe even a little relieved that the relationship is over. Your ‘happily ever after’ story has ended in a separation. However difficult, you know you still have to work together with your ex regarding your children. Being a single parent is not easy, and can be down right exhausting at times. It is hard knowing you have less time with your children while also knowing you have ‘no control’ over what happens at the other house. This can be extremely frustrating and anxiety provoking. However, with some help, the co-parenting relationship may help lighten the load. Remember a few key points when it comes to co-parenting.

 

1. The relationship ended, not your role as a parent

 

2. Your primary focus has to shift

 

3. You can still co-parent successfully, despite your differences

 

4. Never put the kids in the middle

 

5. Say only positive things about your child’s other co-parent

 

The relationship has ended, but your role as a parent has not. You still have a high responsibility to help raise your kids to the best of your ability. Your attention now shifts to your children. This will be a trying time for everyone, but you have to focus on what is best for your children as well as taking care of yourself. Despite the frustrations of the events, you have to do what is best for the kids and be willing to put aside your differences to focus on the children. Protect your children, allow your kids to be kids and never put them in the middle of your conflict. They have enough going on as they attempt to figure out this new normal. Finally, one of the most important pieces is to stay positive and keep the negativity away from your children. All the negativity may unknowingly push them away from you.

 

As you can see, being a single parent can be extremely difficult, but if both parents can put their differences aside and mutually agree to do what is best for their children, you will see tremendous results. Your children will adapt to this change much quicker and with more security and comfort knowing that both parents continue to love and care for them.

What to do When you Suspect Your Spouse is Concealing Marital Assets from You

By Steven Fultonberg CPA/CVA

No one likes to imagine that someone is purposely deceiving them or hiding information from them, especially if such actions involve concealing assets in a marriage. If your spouse is becoming more secretive, erasing trails of certain shared finances and concealing marital assets, it could be a sign that that they are preparing for a pending separation or divorce. Such actions are unethical and potentially illegal. Whether or not you believe your spouse is capable of such wrongdoings, consider the chance that they are doing such and take a proactive approach to getting a definitive answer.

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New Year’s Resolutions for Those Considering or Seeking a Separation or Divorce in 2018

The New Year is a time to start fresh, with a clean slate and with a list of goals to accomplish in the upcoming months. It’s also a time when people take a hard look on their lives and make decisions of about what you want your future to look like.

For those who have taken a hard look at their marriage and determined that a future together is not possible, Triangle Divorce Lawyers has a list of resolutions to guide you through this difficult and confusing time. This time can be incredibly overwhelming with so many unknowns.

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How To: Hide Your Web Browsing Activity (Part 1)

Hiding Your Web Browsing History is pretty important when you are researching sensitive topics like divorce, finding a new place to stay, or anything that might let your spouse know that you are considering action that would affect your marriage.   Keeping your research hidden isn't as easy as just using your phone!  

Today we're going to focus on how to hide your traffic on Google Chrome on the Desktop.  These instructions are good for both Windows and Mac computers.

Use ​an Incognito Window

Google Chrome is a fast and secure browser for the Desktop and mobile.  Marshall, our IT guru, recommends using Google Chrome.  Incognito Mode is a way to browse the internet that does not save any of your browsing history to your computer.  This is an important note.  If your spouse has taken steps to monitor your actions by installing software on your household router, or you are browsing the web at work your traffic can still be monitored.  We'll get to that part later in this series.  For now, this is the easiest step you can take. 

How to use Incognito Mode on Mac and PC Desktops

  1. If you don't  have it installed download Google Chrome and install it on your computer
  2. When you have it installed, launch Google Chrome, click the three dots menu in the upper right hand corner and click "New Incognito Window"
  3. Browse to any website you would like to keep private.  Remember that you should not bookmark anything you don't want your spouse to see.  
  4. You may Google or Visit any site and know that it won't be in your browsing history. 
  5. Make sure to close this window when you are done. 

What if I've Already Browsed on My Computer without Incognito Mode?

This is a great question!  Don't worry.  We've got you.  Below we have several common browsers and how to clear your history.  

You may clear your browsing history in various browsers using by reading the following articles:

Stay Tuned for our Next Article on Securing All Browsing Hisotry using VPN! 

Need More Help?

Our IT Guru is available to help you secure your computers, personal data, and give you ways to protect your data.  You may contact Marshall by visiting his site here: Zen Media Social. ​ He is available for both in person and remote consulting. 

The Many Feelings of Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day comes a week after this year’s Super Bowl, and rightly so, as it is the Super Bowl of feelings. Whether you admit it or not, everyone has “feelings” on Valentine’s Day. You may be the person with the highest of expectations, demanding roses and chocolates followed by a romantic dinner at a restaurant that only takes reservations a year in advance (better start planning for next year!). Perhaps you are in a new relationship, and are wondering just how obligated you are to celebrate this holiday with your new interest or if you should just call it off February 13th to avoid it all together. Then there are the people who refer to Valentine’s Day simply as “Singles Awareness Day,” also known as SAD. They have no significant other and will flaunt this to the world with pride! They need no help finishing the bottle of wine they will be downing come 8pm February 14th.

For those going through a separation or divorce, Valentine’s Day can be one of the worst days of the year, particularly if it is your first one without your ex-spouse. It is easy to develop negative feelings about the day, as you may be feeling lonely or perhaps old memories resurface of what was, but no longer is. Always remember this: Your relationship status on Valentine’s Day is not a reflection of your value. If you are single this year, treat yourself to a special spa day or order some take out and spend the evening with your favorite movies (I suggest comedies). I personally recommend getting lost in a good book or perhaps freshen up your knowledge on the great suffragette, Anna Howard Shaw, born and celebrated on February 14th. Did you know she was also a physician and an inspiration to the famous comedian, Tina Fey?

Maybe you have already moved on to a new relationship, post-separation, and would like to plan a nice Valentine’s Day for your new interest. Although it is best to stay single during the year of separation, it is typically okay to date as long as the relationship did not exist before the date of separation. Post-separation evidence of sexual conduct and relationships can be used to corroborate theories that the relationship existed before separation, which could affect spousal support or strengthen a claim for alienation of affection. However, even if you did not begin dating someone until after the date of separation, a scornful former spouse may see the new relationship as the cause of the marriage’s end and thus causing you additional problems. But of course, feelings and emotions are not ruled by logic and reason and you may want to date soon after the separation. As always, consult with your attorney about whether or not you should take your date out this Valentine’s Day or perhaps wait for February 14, 2017 to celebrate the special occasion.

Whatever your relationship status is this year, it is okay to carry some feelings about Valentine’s Day. It is also important to remember February 14th occurs just once a year and it too shall pass. Besides, this year February 15th is President’s Day, as well as National Flag of Canada Day, and who can’t get behind that?

Trick or Treat Tips for Divorced Parents

Pumpkin spice everything has arrived and that can only mean one thing…..Halloween is just around the corner. If you share custody of your children, holidays can be stressful especially if there is no Order or Agreement that divides the holiday or if your children are not scheduled to be with you this year. So, before Halloween arrives take some time to consider the best way to create great Halloween memories with your children.

  1. Take the children Trick or Treating together.

    If there are lingering tensions between you and your Ex, this is definitely not the solution for you. Children quickly pick up on stress or tensions between their parents and it is important to allow your children to enjoy a stress-free Halloween. On the other hand, if you and your Ex have a calm and cordial relationship, Trick or Treating with you both may be a way to create memories your children will always cherish.

  2. Divide the Trick or Treating route.

    Plan the Trick or Treating route ahead of time with one parent walking with the children for the first half and the other parent walking with the children for the second half. This arrangement allows the children to spend time with both parents and to avoid any tensions that may still exist between you and your Ex.

  3. Take the children to a party or event.

    Many businesses, churches, and organizations offer Halloween activities and parties at times other than traditional Trick or Treating hours. If you cannot be with your children for Trick or Treating itself, take advantage of one of these events.

  4. Plan a Halloween party.

    Plan a Halloween party for a time your children will be with you. With a few spooky decorations and Halloween themed snacks, you can create a Halloween your children will never forget.