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How to Get Through the Painful Process of Divorce

abandoning marriage

Divorce can come quickly and out of nowhere, especially if it’s unwanted in your mind. You have to deal with many changes, emotionally and physically. It can feel overwhelming and as though you don’t know where to turn. Take a deep breath, and try to think as clearly as possible. Here are some tips to help you get through your divorce:

  1. Know it’s normal to feel an array of feelings. When grieving the end of a relationship, it’s normal to feel relieved, sad, angry, scared, confused, or a combination of all of these. Even if you know the divorce is the best thing for you, you can still feel uneasy as you head into the unknown. Accept how you feel and absorb to the fact that things will get better over time. Allow yourself to feel these things but try not to dwell here. 
  2. Stay positive. Yeah, this is easy to say, but much harder to put into action. Still, try to find the positive side: you are about to begin a new phase of your life. Try new things and think about what you can do to meet new people and have new experiences away from your spouse. Make new memories. The saying is “mind over matter,” so try your best to keep your mind in a good place and keep moving forward.
  3. Reach out. You shouldn’t go through this alone. You need to get your feelings out, so talk to your friends and family. Although these people will be there for you, they may not fully understand what you’re experiencing. You might find it helpful to join a support group in which others are going through divorce. If you don’t feel comfortable with any of these options, see a counselor. Once you talk about it, you’ll most likely feel better because it isn’t bubbling inside of you.
  4. You still have a future! One of the hardest parts of divorce is letting go of all of the plans you had with your spouse. You may feel there is no future without him or her, but it’s not true! You had a life before them, and you’ll have a life after them. You may realize future dreams and goals that you had never even thought about until after the divorce. 

A divorce can be extremely painful. If you need help meeting individuals who feel like you or want to get advice from professionals, register for our next monthly workshop at Second Saturday Wake County.


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